RocketJim's

I apologize if my massive sighing sessions worried anyone. Actually, no, it's not about my friends. My close ones didn't change (and seriously, would I even bother about those who are distant?). Even if I got mad at them time to time, I still love them because I am confident in the characters of the people I have chosen as friends. Again, no it's not about them and thank you for those who tried to cheer me up. I am sad, yeah. Pretty down lately but I don't know why either. I'm happy for many people but give me a minute to my own thoughts and I shall frown again. But don't worry, it's just a reality check I go through once in a while to find my emotional/spiritual/whatever balance. Self pity is healthy sometimes.

*sigh*

Just let me be.

It's been 5 years and it's still the same. My heartbeat rate shoots to 200 per minute but dies the next day. Awkward silences after full-stops in conversations. Promises to 'meet soon' that usually never materialize. Then we fly off to different countries...only to come back and repeat the process again. Where and when is the next time we are going to meet? Arab Street? Orchard Road? Tokyo? Beijing? London or Vienna? Maybe next week, maybe next year. Arg. And I thought the Pisces is the most slippery sign! This global sapien is even harder to catch.

Global sapien makes me sad. So do starving children. And sharks killed for their fins. And elderly who have no one to look after them. And people who take their blessed lives for granted. And text messages I don't understand. And friends who gush over their phones. And friends who cry over their good luck when they do deserve it. And people who lie low and play waiting games.

It is sometimes difficult to tell whether or not the most beautiful things in your life are just illusions you create to please yourself. It's painful, but true, that not everything is as it appears.

What's wrong with daydreaming anyway?

PS: I know there are some loyal silent readers out there. Thank you and comment sometimes. (",)